Wednesday, March 21, 2012

HE is pulling me back in

It's time to be real. It's time to write exactly whats going on.

God is after me. He is after my heart. He deeply desires me to obey all that he has planned for me in life. He deeply wants me to come home.

Back in 2003 I left home, the home that Jesus Christ has for me. Although I always believed in him, I wasn't following him. And as I would make 1 step forward in my healing, I would be taken 4 or 5 steps back.

It's amazing how in 1 moment things have changed. God used & is using my beautiful children to get back into my heart. He has put the right people in my life at the right time. He is standing right in front of me and now I'm ready to run into his arms again.

I'm not perfect, but I've been living my life farther from Him than I ever remember in my adult years.

Here is what is happening to me: My son, Jameson, who is the Child to myself and my deceased husband Jeff, has been having a really hard time. He is suffering from major anxiety, having extreme behavioral outburst's, and is extremely sad ALL.THE.TIME. This is the child who has never in his life given me any grief. He has been nearly perfect since the day he was dropped from heaven into my arms, a reminder of the great love from my God and the gift that was left to me form his dad, Jeff. During this difficult time he has been asking me time & again why we don't go to church anymore, why we don't pray, If I believe in God, if other important people in our lives believe in God, Etc etc.

I believe God is using this bump in the road of raising my son to get back to Him, get me back home. Start living whole again. And from this day on I'm going to obey. I'm walking with him, not against him!

Jer 29:11- He knows his plans!

So follow me as I continue my little blog about my little family, because blogging makes me happy, my family makes me happy, and God makes me happy!

2 comments:

Carrie said...

Glad your back. I missed you.

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