Tuesday, September 22, 2009

~how we became who we are part 1

I realize that a few more people are starting to read my blog! Which excites me! I have had this love affair with writing and sharing my life for as long as I can remember. And I love that most people are keenly aware that most lives are far from perfect, including mine (Thank God for forgiveness)!

So I wanted to do a little mini session about how we came to be the appell-igarta family. We'll start with me & how the Igarta got into our equation!

Meet Jeff:



Meet Alexa:


Meet Alexa & Alyssa:



Meet Alyssa falling in love with Jeff (wearing his shorts):

Meet Pete:


Beautiful, eh? Actually this is the lowdown on the story!
Alexa: Alyssa & I were living our happily ever after, just the 2 of us. It was actually really great! We were happy. I was in school full time and also working 4 different jobs making ends meet. I was loving being a mom, loving being a student, and loving being an employee! Yes, times were tough, but God was my #1 and he always knew that my life was going to be OK. I was so on fire as a Christian! I loved reading the bible & having my God to fill any void that I was needing in my life.
Jeff: Jeff had been living in Reno, Nevada for approx. 1 year by the time I came along. I remember the story being told numerous times as how his journey in Reno came to be. He was living in the central coast of California for as long long time when he felt the Lord calling him to move. He made the jump & came to Reno living with friends and finding work. The part of his story that sticks out so much to me is that before he left the coast he told his dad that he was going to Reno to find a wife! (wait for it, wait for it, oh ya!) After giving up his whole life as he knew it & putting God as number 1, Jeff & I crashed into each other with the help of a friend.
Pete: Pete had been a long long time friend of Jeff's. Pete & I met at a bible study & really started to hit it off! I loved Pete, because he was just the sort of friend that I needed at the time! Someone to guide me, someone to help me with my walk, someone to witness to me, someone to love me for who I was. Pete was just that! He was my Friend and He was Jeff's friend. And he knew that Jeff & I should be together. Pete arranged for me (I was only 20) to get into a Jazz club where another friend was playing live music. And then Pete played match maker! Telling Jeff I thought he had a great smile (which WHOA he did) and telling me that Jeff thought I was pretty (or something like that). After leaving the bar we went bowling and hung out- 4 friends!
That's when the flirting started between Jeff & I. And then the phone number exchange & then the phone calls, and then the invitations to hear live music with him! The late night visits started (because I wouldn't allow him to meet my daughter yet). And then love happened. It was fast but it was real! It was awesome. We always prayed about where we were to go in our relationship & what it was supposed to be! It was an amazing feeling for me (& I also think for Jeff).
Soon enough Jeff & Alyssa hit it off. There were times when Alyssa and I were alone ans she would be asking me when Jeff was going to be her daddy! I was excited that God was working in her heart too & allowing her to see what a real dad was! Pete was still a solid rock in our life & our walk into marriage.
Soon into our courtship we choose marriage and more children. We were married in Nov. of 2002 in a small & beautiful ceremony in our home church in California. It was awesome with some of our closest friends being there. We honeymooned 1 night away as Alyssa stayed with her new grandparents who loved her so so much & whom she loved so very much too! In fact I remember Jeff telling me that his mom wanted to know when Alyssa was going to call her grandma! It was exciting to see that relationship grow and bloom! Alyssa also had new aunties & a new uncle who she was so excited to get to know! She was often in the make-up with her auntie & Jeff & I enjoyed watching her relationship with her uncle & aunties grow!
Jeff & I were excited to welcome a baby boy! I loved that when Jeff got the video ultrasound he couldn't stop watching it & was so excited for his little boy to be born. I was excited to see how our relationship with each other & with God was going to play out.
Tragedy: I received a phone call around lunch time on April 28, 2003. I was 8 months pregnant. It was Jeff's boss calling. He had received a phone call that his company truck had been in a fender bender on a busy highway on the central coast of California. He said it was nothing serious, and was wondering if I had heard from Jeff, as to what had happened. He told me the area it had been. I had heard from Jeff approx 15-20 Min's earlier & he was on his way to the shop for lunch break. I tried numerous times to call him and never got ahold of him. That's when I hopped into my car & sped off to the accident scene, almost getting into a few accidents myself. I arrived on the scene to no Jeff. He had been taken to the hospital in an ambulance.
God`s hands were with me the whole day, as I look back on it it was a miserable horrible day, but I was taken care of. I went into a hysterical screaming match at the police demanding to know what happened and they would not tell me. They would not let me back into my car to drive to the hospital as I was freaking out. I did not have a cell phone & only knew 1 number of anyone to call in the whole area as we had only moved there months earlier. I did happen to call my MIL`s house & she answered & into a panic as I screamed into the phone that Jeff was in an accident & that's all I knew. Along came a van with a woman in it who happened to recognize me as I had recently started going to a MOPS (mothers of preschoolers) group at a local church. She got out of her van & spoke to one of the police officers (who coincidental was a christian too) and offered to give me a ride to the hospital. I hopped in with Alyssa and off we went. My MIL was in route also. While we were driving to the hosp. the woman received a phone call (which I later learned was the christian police officer) and she instantly started praying. I had this gut feeling it wasn't good. After being directed to the wrong hospital we were redirected to the hospital where Jeff was. I walked into the bad news room as I like to call it, to my in laws crying and a doctor kneeled down in front of my MIL. Jeff had died. I just remember going into shock. Complete & utter shock. God took control of my life that day & allowed me to get through everything that happens when someone dies. All the planning, all the grief.
That day was the worst day of my life.

4 comments:

Raising Z said...

I am totally and utterly speechless right now. I am so sorry that you have had to deal with so much pain in your life. Wow...I can't even imagine.

Alberta-girl said...

Alexa, I had a hard time reading you recent post through my tears. Your story is so sad and also filled with so much love. I do not know you that well but I can sense from your posts, you are a very strong and beautiful person

Laura said...

Wow, I don't even know what to say! I am so sorry for you loss and pain, I can't even imagine.

I stopped over from MckMama's blog frog and wanted to say HI. Also, I love your name...it's my daughter's name too.

Amanda said...

I just cried reading this. You are one tough cookie Lexie. LOVE YOU!